Krista Phillips is the EVP, head of consumer credit cards and consumer lending marketing at Wells Fargo.

We’ve all heard the term “girl talk,” right? It typically refers to women discussing stereotypically “girly” topics. However, one crucial topic often missing from these conversations is money.

Talking about money can be challenging. Throughout our lives, we’ve been taught that it’s impolite to discuss finances, and this stigma and shame persist even as we age.

It’s important to remember that just a few generations ago, women couldn’t manage their own finances. Only 50 years ago, women in the U.S. lacked the right to control their banking decisions. Economic rights and earning power for women began with the 1974 Equal Credit Opportunity Act, which prohibited credit discrimination based on gender, race, religion, or national origin. Despite this progress, financial equality is still a work in progress.

Recent cultural milestones like the Barbie movie, Beyonce’s Renaissance Tour, and Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour have showcased the significant economic influence women have. So why do we still feel uneasy discussing financial matters?

Focus on confidence
At Wells Fargo, our team collaborated with The Female Quotient to explore how men and women approach financial topics, aiming to uncover insights to help level the playing field.

Our research, titled “Our Secret Numbers: Women, Men, and the Taboo Nature of Financial Health,” surveyed individuals about their “taboo” numbers—age, salary, weight, credit score, financial savings, debt, romantic partners, prescription medications, and spending.

The findings revealed that while men and women are similarly comfortable discussing age and romantic partners, stark and unsurprising differences exist when it comes to finances. This disparity has significant, long-lasting effects on both genders’ mental well-being and financial potential.

The data showed that men are generally more comfortable discussing their financial health throughout their careers than women. For instance, 66% of entry-level employed men feel comfortable discussing their finances compared to 57% of senior-level employed women.

Men reported higher comfort levels at every career stage (66% entry-level, 67% mid-level, 70% senior-level) compared to women (54% entry-level, 55% mid-level, 57% senior-level). Similar disparities were noted in discussions about debt, with men (57% entry-level, 61% mid-level, 67% senior-level) feeling more comfortable than women (50% entry-level, 52% mid-level, 46% senior-level).

Additionally, men are generally happier and more confident in their financial abilities. Nearly half of women (49%) lack confidence in managing their finances, while only 35% of men share this sentiment. Furthermore, 58% of women are unhappy with their financial situation compared to 42% of men.

Treating money as a taboo topic perpetuates a vicious cycle. Feeling awkward about discussing salary or debt leads to silence, which means missing out on advice and opportunities that could enhance financial confidence. While men, statistically more comfortable talking about money, continue to grow financially, women’s financial growth, investment opportunities, and earning potential remain restricted.

This difference often stems from childhood conditioning. Society teaches girls to be cautious with money and boys to be smart, creating distinct perceptions about finances and our roles in managing them.

Our research also indicated that in partnered households, men are more likely to take charge of financial decisions, while women are more inclined to share this responsibility with their partners.

We need to change the conversation about finances. This starts with openly and positively discussing money with our children, being mindful of how we address young girls. Without this, societal conditioning can profoundly impact how girls perceive money as they grow up.

We must also remember that if you never raise your hand, your questions remain unanswered. Women are often taught that discussing money is impolite. However, the best way to learn about anything is to talk about it—and we need to talk more about money.

Let’s reclaim our power and ensure future generations understand that “girl talk” includes what matters most to us in our daily lives: feelings, careers, hopes, dreams—and money.